Sunday, July 17, 2011


It seems my brain is stuck on a few topics. One of them is friendship which is what my last post was about. My wheels have been turning regarding this topic but more so as to how it relates to the younger generation today.

I think friendships for today's young teens and teens are so different then what I experienced as a teen. My friendships, as eluded to in the previous post, were close and personal. I had a face to face relationship with my friends. I shared with them and they with me as we would ride bikes or drive somewhere or just take a walk to the store to get away from parents. While I know these types of friendships still do exist, it seems that they are not as common. Now, sharing is done via text message or facebook posts/messages. There is something lost in a text message or a facebook message. These modes of communication lose the body language and non-verbal cues that we rely on for precise interpretation when we communicate face to face. It is the reason why e-mail communication is never as reliable as face to face talking.

Facebook, in particular, contributes a unique element to the world of friendships. Most people have several friends and often not all of them get together at the same time. I know as a teen I would on occasion spend time with Jen but more often spent time with Kris. Usually the one didn't know I was with the other. If I was with Kris, most likely Jen was with some other friends of hers. Seldom were the three of us together outside of school. We just weren't a threesome. There were no hurt feelings or feeling left out because we didn't broadcast to the facebook world what we were doing. That is not the case now.

Now, I see hurt because a couple friends posted pictures of their time together and my child realizes she was, once again, left out. Or they announce plans on facebook and she knows that once again she was not included. Of course, there is no law that says everyone has to be inluded all the time, but when it is made known in such a public forum, it hurts. Human nature is such that when we feel we are not wanted, it hurts. And I fear that these kinds of hurts are leaving scars that will not easily go away. No one likes to feel unloved or unwanted, yet that is precisely what often happens with facebook.

I need to step up prayers for my child, that she would be protected from others' insensitivity...that she would know regardless of what so called friends on earth think of her, that in the eyes of God, she is valued as a precious treasure. That doesn't go far right now when she feels left out. I just don't know what else to do.

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